Schneid Remarks - 7/20/23

I know it has been a while since I have written, or duplicated, anything in this column space.

As we all know, it has been extremely busy the past month with city celebrations, which all had great turnouts!

With that being said, I have been presented the 12 commandments for seniors. Depending on who you ask, I am now a senior citizen at age 57. Others say it is 60 and yet others say it is 65. When I read these commandments, I realized I think I might qualify right now as a senior.

1. Talk to yourself. There are times you need an expert opinion.

2. “In Style” are the clothes that still fit. Amen to that one.

3. You don’t need anger management. You just need to find people that don’t make you mad. I cleaned that one up a bit.

4. Your people skills are fine. It’s your tolerance for idiots that needs work.

5. The biggest lie you tell yourself is, “I don’t need to write that down. I’ll remember that.” This is so true. Whenever someone tells me something I need to remember either I write it down on something or I type it into my phone.

6. “On time” is when I get there.

7. Even duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it sure does muffle the sound.

8. It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller.

9. Lately, you’ve noticed people your age are so much older than you.

10. Growing old should have taken much longer.

11. Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn’t shut you up.

12. You still haven’t learned to act your age and hope you never will.

And one more - One for the road means going to the bathroom before you leave the house.